Tuesday, June 27, 2006

You've got to be kidding!

Did I not specifically request no surprises, except really good ones? I distinctly remember doing so. Bad idea.

Just minutes after DH had left for the hospital, the phone rings. Uh-oh.

It's DH.
DH: "Small problem, I seem to have taken a wrong bus. It's an express service to WayOutOfTown."
Me: "Shall I come get you?"
DH:"I could take the next bus back into town".
Me: "Shall I come GET YOU?"
DH:"Yes. The first stop is in MiddleOfNowhere."

My heart sinks, but I don't panic. I grab the bare necessities: cell phone, GPS-tracker and navigator, handbag and jump in the car. I only have a vague idea of where he is, luckily the navigator is content to take me to MiddleOfNowhere, without knowing an exact address.

Ok, so I drive a little crazier than usual, and use the phone in the car without a handsfree set (big no-no).
5 phone calls later ("Where are you? How do I get there? WHERE?") I retrieve DH.
He's so shocked by his misadventure that he even lets me drive back. The GPS guides us straight to the clinic, and I manage to keep it together all the way, even through a grueling 5 minutes of slow traffic on the highway.

While I park the car, DH goes to the lab to finally deliver the goods, after 1 hour and 15 minutes of travelling. According to DH, they said it would be ok. I'll have to take his word for it.
I tried calling the dr. for advice on how to proceed, but he didn't pick up so I left a message on his voicemail. Is there any point in doing the IUI?

Now, you're either cursing at DH or laughing by now (I know I'll find this funny some day). But honestly, I can't be angry with him. I told him he could take a bus, any bus that starts with the number 97. That's what he did.
I told him to ask the driver whether the bus went past the clinic. He did, but the bus driver mumbled something and shook his head in some way, which DH took as a yes. Apparently, that should have been 'No'. An honest mistake, which could have happened to me (except I'm a more experienced bus traveler). What should he have done? Held up two signs in front of the driver with "Yes" and "No" and ask the driver to point to one? Helping customers find their way is only his job, even if it's tedious. Ugh.
Express lines are generally marked 'Express', but DH said he didn't see it. It looked like any other bus. The older models just have a sign in front, which are easy to miss if you're not looking for it. The newer ones state it loud and clear next to the number. And it hadn't occurred to me to warn him about express buses.

Oh, and the odds of this happening?
6 buses with line number 97x go to the clinic. Only 1 doesn't. That's roughly a 14% chance of taking the wrong bus. Compound that with getting a non-reply from the driver (rough guess 25%). You're left with a 3,5% chance of taking the wrong bus.
Compare this to the odds of success with IUI/inj: 15%.
Can you see my frustration here?

Next time, DH said he'll be taking the car.

I'm just surprised I didn't get pulled over by the police. That's all that was missing to make this the perfect skit for a comedy movie. Who was the blogger had this happen to her, only to be escorted to the hospital with sirens wailing?

Fast forward two hours, time to go back to the clinic for the IUI. I do take the bus, the right one, so no problems there. The lab hands me the sample without a fuss (they don't even ask for ID, or my husband's name for that matter. I checked the vial though, his name was on it.). I go to the clinic and am told to take a seat. After a mere 5 minutes my name is called, but by a woman I don't know. Dr. Albatross isn't available as he's doing surgery (so that's why he hasn't called back yet), but he asked her to fill in. I'm glad he found a replacement, but I had hoped to see him and ask him some questions. Dr. StandIn said I could call him tomorrow morning during consultation hours.

Beta day is July 11th, but I think I'm going to declare this a non-event. So I am now in a non-2WW. Right now it's pessimism galore. What do you want with those odds.

I hope your day went better.

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At 27 June, 2006 15:07, Blogger zhl said...

Oh, Lut. Well, you may not be able to laugh about it yet, but you made me laugh. Still hoping this one works for you. Would make a great story for the kiddo (or scar the kid for life but always a possibility once you've got one).

At 27 June, 2006 16:09, Blogger Angie said...

What a great story. I'm sure you're not laughing, but I was able to enjoy it! I hope everything turns out marvelous! I would have to think that if DH got on the wrong bus with such small odds, that this would have to work..

At 27 June, 2006 16:10, Blogger Meg said...

Ah, Lut. Sounds like a DISASTER! But you never never know. x

At 27 June, 2006 16:21, Blogger Mary Ellen and Steve said...

I am sorry about all the craziness on the way to the clinic. Who knows....maybe this will end up being a great story for your little one if this cycle works. I have everything crossed that you get your BFP at the end of this 2ww. Hugs.

At 27 June, 2006 17:00, Blogger Winnifred said...

MAYBE all that happened to be the making of a great story... "this is how you were concieved..." sounds more interesting than "we drove to the clinic and then left"

SO... i'm going to take the misadventure as a positive ;)


At 27 June, 2006 17:00, Blogger Pamplemousse said...

Oh, Lut. I once got on the express train to Queens in NYC and got shouted at by a cop in the station for my stupidity.

Your poor hubby. At least he still managed to produce the goods and you got the IUI done. No harm, no foul (apart from your BP!!).

At 27 June, 2006 18:19, Blogger Keeping The Faith said...

Lut- I don't think you need to be too concerned about how long it took you to get there w/ the sample. It always takes J and I an hour to get to our clinic and I have been told that is fine. If you were keeping the sample warm than you truly have nothing to worry about. Sometimes clinics keep the sample sitting out or in an incubator up to 2 hours before they wash it. I guess the actual washing process doesn't take that long and they need it to sit for a while and "liquefy". Semen starts out as a thick "snot" kind of consistency and then thins out and liquefies in about an hour. So they wouldn't have started to work w/ it yet anyway. Hope that helps. I've had the same concerns and have asks numerous times since it takes us an hour to get to my RE.

At 27 June, 2006 20:19, Anonymous Sarah said...

What an adventure! It will be a great story to tell your kids! It is tough to be positive especially when there are these surprises along the way. My fingers are crossed for you and good luck in the 2ww!

At 27 June, 2006 22:44, Blogger Sunnie said...

My head hurts just thinking of it.... I can imagine both of you racing around like mad. I hope it all works out.

At 28 June, 2006 03:35, Blogger sube said...

Well, look at it this way. If the odds of catching the wrong bus were 3.5% (very funny calculation by the way) and the odds of a successful IUI are 15%, that means the odds are in your favor!

Hope the 2ww is an express as well.

At 28 June, 2006 04:53, Blogger projgen said...

Hee, sounds like a keystone cops episode ;) I hope all of that craziness gives you good cause to laugh someday.

And how nice am I? To help keep your mind of your 2ww, I tagged you with a meme. You can thank me later.

At 28 June, 2006 05:58, Blogger S said...

Oh shit, Lut, I know you can't truly think it's funny yet, but I so needed a laugh today, and I got it!

It sounds like something that would happen to my hubster, especially adding in the complication that he hates to ask for directions....

Here's hoping the non-2WW goes by quickly, and that the non-beta shows that the non-event is an Event indeed.

At 28 June, 2006 06:36, Blogger torahumaddachic said...

this actually was a scene in the movie "forget paris" where the male lead actor has to rush across town with a semen sample, gets pulled over for speeding, and explains and gets a "sirens blaring" escort to the fertility clinic....

At 28 June, 2006 23:20, Blogger Bronwyn said...

LOL -- that sounds like a Seinfeld episode! I agree with the gang, this has all the hallmarks of a great conception story. Good luck!

At 29 June, 2006 00:11, Blogger Hopeful Mother said...

Oh, Lut, what a crazy day. It sounds to me like you have used up your bad luck, so you should have a good luck ending to this story!

I'll keep my fingers crossed, anyway!

At 29 June, 2006 00:23, Blogger GZ said...

Don't give up hope just yet, you never know.

It's funny how, when your IF, something like taking the wrong bus can ruin your whole month.

Sorry hun.

At 29 June, 2006 09:10, Blogger Thalia said...

Wow, what a saga. I think it's MORE likely to work now this has happened, not less. It will just be the universe's little joke. At least that's what I'm hoping.

At 29 June, 2006 15:35, Blogger Just another Jenny said...

I agree with Thalia, it's probably more likely to work because it seems like everything went wrong.

It is very good of you to not be mad at your husband. I hope you and your children can look back on this and laugh together some day.

At 29 June, 2006 18:22, Blogger katty said...

I liked your statistical calculation!
I hope this cycle works......
your poor husband. it sounds like the kind of thing that i would do.

At 29 June, 2006 20:21, Blogger soralis said...

I am just catching up after my vacation. Oh my... I am so sorry about the mix up!

Hope all works out!

Take care


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