Friday, November 03, 2006

Average

The stimming has been uneventful, thanks to all the needle training I've done the past 6 months. I haven't felt any side-effects of note.

Today's u/s showed 9 follicles in total, ranging from 7-11 mm. 5 on RO, 4 on LO (no hiding today).

That result is nothing to frown at, but my greedy new-to-IVF self isn't satisfied. My 'you're still young' ovaries produce 9?
This is my supposedly PCO-tic - should be well responders - ovaries we're talking about?
The doctor aims for between 5 and 15 follicles. 9 is just below average. Great, a C+. Or is that a B- this days?

Yes, yes, I need some perspective. But I'm giving myself permission to feel a little disappointed, just for 1 day.

My husband's response: "it only takes 1". Sweet of him to try, but ... sigh. Nearly 3 years of trying with 1 hasn't really worked for us, has it. And it's a numbers game, how many will they retrieve, how many mature, ...

Tomorrow, I'm going to realize that average isn't that bad in IVF land. The average IVF patient takes home a baby, eventually.
I'm also going to remember that lots of follicles at once is pretty painful and increases the risk of OHSS.
Finally, I'll start hoping that it's quality over quantity, and that all of this batch makes it to pick-up.

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19 Comments:

At 03 November, 2006 10:55, Blogger Thalia said...

First, more may appear. I've gone from 9 at about your stage to about 15 by collection, so don't do yourself down too soon.

Second, this is your first IVF stim cycle so they're just figuring it out. You might as well give them a C+ for not having set your dose slightly higher - it seems to be incredibly hard to predict how any of us will respond until they've done it once (or even twice).

Third, with PCOS you REALLY really don't want an overstim as you get crappy eggs, a bloated abdomen, potentially a cancelled cycle, and OHSS to boot. So under rather than overstim is definitely the way to go.

But yes, I would be a little disappointed, too.

 
At 03 November, 2006 11:20, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I hope the disappointment passes quickly, and you can get on with believing all those things at the end of the post. Because they're all true enough, just as your disappointment today is real enough. Let's just hope the stim is good enough.

Bea

 
At 03 November, 2006 12:15, Anonymous Meri-ann said...

For your first cycle I've got to say that's pretty good numbers (skewed I suppose by my crappy response)- but then again I'm used to feeling disappointed and hate that you are feeling that way....
I hope that things look brighter real soon.

 
At 03 November, 2006 13:32, Blogger Mary Ellen and Steve said...

I am with Thalia, more may definitely appear. It is okay to be disappointed. I hope that it passes soon and is replaced by hope that this cycle is the one. Hugs Lut. I am pulling for you.

 
At 03 November, 2006 15:22, Blogger zhl said...

It's all just such a mindf*ck at this point. You want more, but not too many. Try to hang in there.

 
At 03 November, 2006 15:43, Blogger soralis said...

Wishing you wonderful quality. I understand how frustrating it is when the numbers seem low. I ret. 20 eggs the first time and 10 the second time.

Take care and good luck

 
At 03 November, 2006 16:13, Blogger A.M.S. said...

I like your plan of allowing one day of disappointment. It's a healthy way to get through this. Yes, you know that 9 is not a bad number for a first IVF and one is all it takes, but you're also spending so much money and emotional currency on this that one day of wallowing is perfectly acceptable.

That said (and because your day is just about past) CONGRATS on nine! I'm sure that number will go up in the next couple of days and if it doesn't, that is still a great PCOS response...not too high to pose a risk and not too low.

Glad to hear the stims are going well and the side effects are taking it easy. That's worth a lot, right there!

 
At 03 November, 2006 17:15, Blogger Josie said...

I have found that I need to allow myself the disappointment, even if others tell me otherwise. I had 7 eggs the 1st time and 15 the 2nd. Dr. only wanted more because of sperm and egg problems we have so it would increase our odds that some would fertilize. Your stimming went well so your eggs should be of good quality and that is all your need. Plus, you do have a good number of them. I know you always want more, but it looks promising.

 
At 03 November, 2006 17:28, Blogger Heather said...

Hope you have some super quality and make it!

 
At 03 November, 2006 18:45, Blogger Just another Jenny said...

I remember that feeling. I was disappointed with the number of follicles we had too. I think everybody wants the perfect cycle, not the average one. You know about perfect cycles though - those one's never work!

 
At 03 November, 2006 19:44, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah, it only takes one, but it would be nice to have lots. LOL.

You're right - quality over quanitity! I don't blame you for being disappointed - I would be, too, but it's not over!

 
At 03 November, 2006 22:06, Blogger k #2 said...

I hate to say this but I think many RE are very conservative with drugs the first cycle of any drug to see how your body reacts. So, really 9 is a great #. That, and I was always shocked how quickly those #s can change on a day to day basis.

I think this sounds like a good cycle. Give yourself the day to be ticked and then focus on those 9 "perfect" eggs! :)

 
At 04 November, 2006 21:53, Anonymous Lori said...

I'm sorry you're feeling disappointed with your follicle counts. I mean, most of us don't usually strive for average. But in this case, average is actually pretty darn good. Of course you could have above average fertilization rates even with an average number of follicles - so there is still a chance to be an overachiever!

 
At 04 November, 2006 22:06, Anonymous Sarah said...

I think that 9 sounds pretty good. As much as this whole process can be filled with disappointment, try to see the positive side of each step along the way. 9 is better than none and for the risks that Thalia mentioned, overstim isn't worth it. Good luck.

 
At 04 November, 2006 23:31, Blogger Susie said...

mmm - the only takes one thing doesn't work much for me these days as well

 
At 05 November, 2006 04:48, Blogger UtRus said...

Thalia is right. you do not want to overstim. and more really might appear - that's what happened to me, too. and anyway, 9 really is not bad!

fingers crossed for quality Lut C.
hugs

 
At 05 November, 2006 13:50, Blogger Angie said...

Ditto Thalia. After reading these blogs, I do know that things can change overnight. I'm hoping your hubby's right and you get that one good one! Or several more!!! :-)

 
At 06 November, 2006 04:21, Anonymous Anonymous said...

More will show up by retrieval - but even if they don't - and you have a great fertilisation - 9 good quality embryos is awesome.

In fact there was a sheet somewhere with stats on being under 35 and having more than 7 = v.high chance of success.

Must be time for the next u/s?

 
At 08 November, 2006 07:52, Blogger Lara said...

Hi Lut, sorry to post so late, but I just wanted to tell you that I would have KILLED for 9 eggs at retrieval! I only got 3. Luckily all of them fertilized but still...none to freeze. Maybe you'll get some to freeze as well! Good luck with your retrieval...im sure it'll go well!

 

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