Monday, November 13, 2006

Zero

The results are in: we have zero embryos.

The eggs looked good, the sperm looked good, but nothing happened. The lab was very much surprised. No ICSI was tried, it was too late.

Needless to say, I'm in shock.

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42 Comments:

At 13 November, 2006 14:52, Blogger Sami said...

I know this is not sufficient, but I am so very sorry... I am saddened by your news and don't even begin to know what to say. Know I'm thinking of you...

 
At 13 November, 2006 14:53, Blogger My Reality said...

OMG, Lut. I don't even know what to say. I am so sorry that this has happened. This is all just so unfair.

 
At 13 November, 2006 15:21, Anonymous Kath said...

Oh, no, Lut. No! I'm so terribly sorry. I wish I could come over and comfort you somehow, though I know there's no comfort to be had right now.

SHIT. I could just go kick something.

 
At 13 November, 2006 15:27, Blogger Josie said...

So, so sorry Lut. This is bringing back such strong feelings for me and I am so sorry. After our 1st IVF w/ no fertilization I cried and cried and cried. Please let me know if I can do anything for you in any way. The feelings of disappointment are so incredibly strong. I am truly sorry.

 
At 13 November, 2006 15:50, Blogger Makariya said...

I'm so sorry. I know there are no words that could make it better... it's so unfair.

 
At 13 November, 2006 16:01, Blogger A.M.S. said...

I am so sorry. You are in my thoughts...

 
At 13 November, 2006 16:38, Anonymous Anonymous said...

OMG, I am so sorry. There just aren't words.

 
At 13 November, 2006 16:53, Anonymous Nina said...

Oh nooooooooo! Oh no!

I'm in shock too. How I HATE the zero thing. How I hate it. I'm sad, but mostly I am angry and in disbelief and so sorry! Nobody ever should have to go through this.

Big hug from my side, if you want to talk via i.e. MSN or Yahoo Messenger let me know and I switch it on later tonight or I could call you?

Nina

 
At 13 November, 2006 17:30, Blogger squarepeg said...

Oh my god I too am in shock.

I'm just stunned. I hope that you can get some answers becuause this fucking blows.

I wish I could give you a hug. You are very, very much in my thoughts.

damn.

 
At 13 November, 2006 17:36, Blogger zhl said...

Oh my god. What a shock. I am so, so sorry for you and the husband.

Damn. I wish I could stop time and go back and ICSI your eggs.

 
At 13 November, 2006 17:40, Blogger EJW said...

Lut, I'm so sorry. That really blows.

 
At 13 November, 2006 17:53, Blogger Hopeful Mother said...

Lut, this is so horrible. I am so, so sorry. It sucks to feel like everything is going great, and then all the sudden somebody slams on the brakes. That's how I felt with our one lone embryo, (which doesn't really look all that promising at this point either.)

I join the others in saying how unfair and sucky this is. I am also angry that this is so difficult for all of us.

We are here for you, Lut. I hope that can bring you some comfort. Sending you and your husband a hug...

 
At 13 November, 2006 18:09, Blogger Heather said...

I'm so sorry.

fuck.

 
At 13 November, 2006 18:25, Anonymous Bebe said...

Oh no!

I am just so sorry for you.
Crap this just sucks.

 
At 13 November, 2006 19:08, Anonymous Carrie P said...

oh no, Lut, this is horrible news - you must feel dreadful. I'm so sorry.

I feel a bit odd posting this as I'm not a good commenter, just a (very assiduous) lurker. I mean you the best, so please forgive me if it's the wrong time to bring up someone else's story while you are licking your wounds.

I just wanted to remind you of Mellie's story over at iftheredsoxcanwin.blogspot.com. They had zero fertilisation on her first IVF earlier this year. Second time round they used ICSI and she is happily pregnant. I hope the same will happen for you.

 
At 13 November, 2006 19:31, Blogger Millie said...

Fuck fuck fuckity fuck.

I'm so very sorry.

 
At 13 November, 2006 19:37, Anonymous Wavery said...

What the hell??? How awful for you, I am so sorry. I hope somehow, you get some answers. Are your RE's giving you any insight?

I am so terribly sorry this happened.

 
At 13 November, 2006 19:40, Anonymous Anonymous said...

NOOOOOOOOOOO! I am thinking of you today as I can't imagine your frustration and sadness by this news.

 
At 13 November, 2006 20:11, Blogger DinosaurD said...

Oh Lut, I'm so sorry. Is there nothing they can do to try to figure out what happened (other then trying ICSI next time?)
Crap - and after such a great looking cycle too.
DinoD

 
At 13 November, 2006 20:50, Blogger Thalia said...

That is just absolutely bloody awful. My initial response when I saw this on bloglines was unprintable, so i will do like kath and just go and kick something. Unfuckingbelievable.

 
At 13 November, 2006 21:46, Anonymous Meri-ann said...

OH Lut, this is fucking unbelievable. I am so, so sorry- I wish I had words for you.
I just can't get my head around it....

 
At 13 November, 2006 22:18, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow - I am so sorry. I just don't know what else to say.

 
At 13 November, 2006 22:29, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How crushing! I'm so, so sorry.

 
At 13 November, 2006 22:33, Blogger Summer said...

I'm speechless. This sucks beyond words.

 
At 13 November, 2006 22:34, Blogger Pamplemousse said...

Motherfucker!! I know the despair and the anguish all too well and my shoulder is here for you, Lut.

 
At 13 November, 2006 22:43, Blogger soralis said...

I am so very sorry. Thinking of you.

 
At 13 November, 2006 22:44, Anonymous Anonymous said...

{{hugs}} Thinking of you.

 
At 13 November, 2006 23:21, Blogger Courtney said...

((hugs)) my heart broke when I read your post. You are in my thoughts and prayers

 
At 13 November, 2006 23:27, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fuck! I'm in shock, did not expect this (who does?)
It's so devastating to have lost all those eggs.
Take heart in the story Carrie P just left.
All along I know you've been in fear of this situation, take care.

 
At 13 November, 2006 23:35, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shit, Lut. Shit. I guess you know why the IUI wasn't working now. Thankfully you still have ICSI up your sleeve, although it's pretty small consolation on a day like today, I'm sure. If you want secret hope stories about people who went through this and triumphed the second try around, come and find me, but I won't force them on you today.

Bea

 
At 14 November, 2006 00:16, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow, I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you.

 
At 14 November, 2006 01:32, Blogger Ladybug Ann said...

I am so so sorry, Lut. Sending hugs.

 
At 14 November, 2006 02:43, Anonymous Leggy said...

Nina (Stella/Ben) sent me over here. I'm so sorry. How awful. I've had embryos explode in the petri dish (leading to a cancelled transfer) and its a similar hell. I'm really, really sorry you have to go through this.

 
At 14 November, 2006 05:17, Blogger InDueTime said...

Oh good grief..I am so so so sorry Lut! I can't imagine what you feel right now. Hugs sweetie, hugs!

 
At 14 November, 2006 08:56, Blogger Meg said...

Oh Lut, I am so so sorry to hear about your news. I can only imagine how you feel right now.

I know it may not be welcome right now, and send me a virtual slap in the face if you like, but ditto what Carrie said... this happened to a friend of mine, and she is now 22 weeks with a FET from IVF #3, in which they finally decided to use ICSI.

I am thinking of you.

 
At 14 November, 2006 09:10, Blogger Twisted Ovaries said...

Oh Sweetie-I am so sorry. There are no words to describe the level of unfair suck that is. I'm around if you need to talk...

 
At 14 November, 2006 14:50, Anonymous Kath said...

Dear Lut, I'm just checking in to say I'm thinking of you all the time. In fact, we're probably all thinking of you so much, you have a terrible buzzing in your ears on top of everything else.

If only thoughts were changes...

 
At 14 November, 2006 15:37, Blogger Just another Jenny said...

I am just as shocked as you are and so very sorry. The waiting time to hear fertalization results is so nerve wracking, it breaks my heart to think of you getting that shitty news.

 
At 15 November, 2006 21:40, Blogger The Town Criers said...

Lut--I'm so sorry. I just heard. I wish there were magic words to say right now that could move back time.

 
At 17 November, 2006 21:52, Blogger Beagle said...

I'm so very sorry. Every failed cycle is such a blow, but this much be extra hard because the shock comes before hope even has a chance.

I know from personal experience that being told how "rare" your situation is, is no consolation!

Give yourself some time to heal and we'll be here to cheer on the ICSI try when you're ready.

 
At 20 November, 2006 08:37, Blogger Lyrehca said...

So very sorry for your news.

 
At 20 November, 2006 16:27, Anonymous Flicka said...

Oh, Lut. I'm so sorry.

 

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