Thursday, April 19, 2007

12w5d - Time for an u/s and a nickname

Today we had another appointment with our ob/gyn for an u/s. All is well with the little one, our Insider. For the first time, it really looked like a tiny human, wriggling about this way and that.

The Insider is 6 cm from head to bottom, about the width of my palm. Dr. Sunshine pointed out the beating heart, the developing brain, stomach, bladder. I'm amazed she could make all that out from the scan, but I trust her experience and skill. All looks well, and we were very happy to hear that.

Next was an attempt to measure the nuchal fold. It took some patience, because the Insider wouldn't sit still. Not that we minded looking at the screen some more.
After a while, the doctor did manage to get a measurement - 1 mm - which is very good.

I had blood drawn for a triple test, and will get the results next week.  If those results are good too, we won't be doing any invasive testing. If not, we'll see.

To say we're overjoyed is an understatement.

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Monday, April 16, 2007

Hunting for daycare

In the category 'worries I'm fortunate to have' - reader discretion is advised.

As I said before, in these parts you have to start looking for daycare as soon as possible.
The main reason is that most mothers are working mothers. Staying at home was still fairly common in my mother's generation, but that has changed. Maternity leave is fairly short to boot: 3 months.  As generous my government is with funding ART, so stingy are they with maternity leave.  There are a number of schemes to extend your leave, some (partly) paid, some unpaid, but you have to meet qualifications etc. That's a fortunate worry for another day.

I applied for a spot in a municipal daycare centre and am now on a waiting list. They won't tell me whether they can actually offer me a spot before August. Therefor, I have to look for other options as well. Easier said than done.

At 10 weeks, I visited a private daycare, and got the line "well, you're quite late looking for daycare".
Late? Late! When should I have started? When I saw two pink lines? Between beta 1 and 2? When I chucked birth control, all those years ago? I was a bit upset at that response, basically because it reminded me of all those women who could actually be so confident as to apply for daycare as soon as they quit birth control. Sigh.

Another private daycare centre had a spot, but wanted me to pay for the first month up front, right away.
I'd be willing to do that, if it were possible to annul (say a couple of months beforehand) and get a refund. However they don't offer that possibility. I understand their need for commitment, otherwise parents enroll but don't show up in the end, leaving them holding the bag. But I can't agree with those terms, they're not fair. Also, I don't feel comfortable to commit yet. How can I when I'm being asked to predict where we'll be in approximately 10 months time. For one, I don't know how things will work out with my job yet.

An alternative to daycare centres are family daycares, where someone takes care of up to 6 children in their own home. I've enrolled on the waiting list of a non-profit agency, again I won't get an answer till much later.

The whole idea of needing daycare still strikes me as surreal. A baby - in this household? I suppose that's why I'm feeling so laid back about finding daycare. That, and the fact that this worry pales in comparison with those of infertility treatment. No daycare, no work. Whatever. We'd be poorer, for sure, but not poor in any real sense. I'd have to sharpen my budgetary skills, but we'd manage. Truth be told, the idea of spending some time as a SAHM does attract me. Especially the mom part. :-)

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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

10w2d - substance

On the symptom front, nothing new to report. I no longer get up every night to go to the bathroom, but I gather that's a normal development. I'm still hungrier than usual, though I had hoped that would diminish as I start cutting down the progesterone supplements.
Those of you who have suffered or are suffering through rough PG symptoms might be ticked off at my repeating the lack of symptoms every time. But out there, I'm sure, is someone googling 'no symptoms after IVF' in despair. And if you haven't had the opportunity, I hope you do soon. Besides, if I don't write it down, I will forget.

If it weren't for the scans and blood tests, I really wouldn't have any clue about being PG. I do feel something of substance growing beneath the fluff on my abdomen. Or am I imagining things? Maybe, it's my bladder I feel from time to time. Anyway, I'm starting to understand how some women just don't realize they're PG.

One the one hand I can't wait to start showing, to make this all more real. On the other hand, I'm glad to have my little secret, a happy one this time.

Strangely, work is one of the few places where I feel reality sinking in. I sit in meetings where plans are made for the rest of the year, and each time a date is mentioned I think where I might be by then - showing, heavily PG, on maternity leave ...  If I want to go back to work, I need to look for daycare now.  In between, I wonder whether there will be a job to go back to.  Formally speaking, I have limited job security, though in practice I know I'm not that easily replaced, candidates aren't exactly lining up. Still I worry, because I know reassurances won't be forthcoming, purely due to bureaucratic reasons. Oh well, there are worse things to worry about, and it isn't keeping me up at night.

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