Friday, October 23, 2009

Well, glad that's sorted!

In brief: 2 PG announcements this week! I'm envious, very much so. Forgive the rant.

A good while ago I visited a good friend of mine, a fertile myrtle but I don't hold it against her. 
She had just had an early miscarriage and was understandably sad about that. And truly, I was and am sorry for her loss.
At the same time, a little voice in me said she'd still be having a baby before me.

Last week, I decided I really ought to get in touch with her again, after all I know what reproductive setbacks feel like.
She'd always supported me to the best of her ability.

Of course, she's PG. OF COURSE!  Sure, I'm very happy for her, but a part of me wishes I didn't know.

I had almost convinced myself that I'm being silly, thinking that our cycle is now doomed for certain.
Too bad I opened my FB account today, because I was slapped in the face by ultrasound pics from another friend of mine.

So glad that's sorted, I have found the friend-who-gets-PG-for-free-while-I-go-through-great-lenghts-to-achieve-the-same. Wait, I have two FWGPFFWIGTGLTATS (doesn't that pack much more punch than ARGH?). And I was feeling so calm before this news arrived.

I know, I know, it's not rational to think this way. This isn't logic speaking, this is looming panic. Sure it worked once, but that doesn't guarantee anything. And there's an end to the amount of cycles we'll do.
Maybe tomorrow I'll find my calm again.

The good news is that so far things are progressing well. Next check-up on Monday.


At 23 October, 2009 22:47, Blogger devonmarie said...

The pregnancy announcements do seem harder to take when your cycling dont they? I had 2 in one week a couple of weeks ago, I also felt that meant of course my IVF won't work. It's not logical, but when you have to fight so hard for what others get easily sometimes its hard to have a logical reaction.

Good luck to you-

At 24 October, 2009 03:25, Blogger Sara said...

Ugh. Now you get to be jealous AND to feel crappy about being jealous. Great.

I'm sorry.

At 24 October, 2009 13:12, Anonymous Kath said...

Er... ultrasound pics on Facebook?

Sorry. I'm a bit stunned.

But that's neither here nor there. I can imagine how hard it is to take that news, particularly right now. And how hard it is to stop the thoughts of doom and gloom from crowding in. But I'm here to back up that voice in your ear, the one that's saying "This doesn't mean bad news for you!" Because I'm sure that other voice is getting pretty loud, and it really should give it a rest. Right? XO


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