Monday, September 06, 2010

6dp3dt - Where's a spare candle

In brief: doom and gloom are lurking in the shadows

I find myself composing 'BFN' posts in my head. I think about when we
might do another fresh cycle. Need I say more?

I know better then to look for signals from my body. Everything is a
side-effect of the hormone supplements.
Even then, great fatigue is the only one that I can put on my list.
Going to bed at the same time as Linnea two nights in a row solved
that.

How deep will I fall this time, that's what I'm worried about. If I
can't deal with the 2WW and the aftermath anymore, the only solution
is to quit.

I try very hard to halt the negative thought spirals, but I don't
always succeed.

Sometimes, just sometimes, an image of twins pops into my head. For a
fleeting moment it will linger, until I'm forced to shake my head at
the improbability. Getting one - let alone two - live take-home babies
out of this? Unfathomable.

10 Comments:

At 06 September, 2010 15:39, Blogger Roccie said...

Walk it off. No time for getting negative now. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain in believing this will be successful.

ps - I dont remember getting that tired in the 2WW but I was progesterone suppositories - maybe not as "strong" as the injections. I hope you fall asleep after lunch today.

 
At 06 September, 2010 17:14, Blogger Sara said...

FWIW, I think that neither your attitude nor your "instincts" have any bearing on the outcome of a given cycle. Having said that, I think it's going to work for you this time--'cause, you know, MY instincts are a totally different matter;-). Hang in there, Lut. It's just a few more days now.

 
At 06 September, 2010 20:31, Blogger My Reality said...

I hope you will soon be composing the "I was so wrong, it isn't a BFN" post.

 
At 07 September, 2010 00:53, Blogger Thalia said...

Well, it's too soon to call, of course, although of course you have the negative post in your head. Have you also even vaguely considered the positive one?en

 
At 07 September, 2010 12:41, Blogger Bea said...

This is the hard part. I have every hope, so that angle is covered if you don't feel up to it! As for having to quit if you can't cope? It is just not the right time to think about what you will do. Coping is a strange thing, it can come and go, it can be refreshed sometimes, it can't really be well predicted in advance.

I am sure, in the long term, you will be fine no matter what. I am hoping for the easiest road from here.

Bea

 
At 07 September, 2010 15:18, Blogger serenity said...

This is the hard part, yes. The 2ww is the worst part, by far.

I have got lots of hope for you too, Lut.

xoxo

 
At 07 September, 2010 16:44, Anonymous Mrs. Hope said...

Hoping, hoping, hoping. This is the worst part of the wait. Good luck and hope you can find something distracting.

 
At 08 September, 2010 19:48, Blogger Hopeful Mother said...

I hate this part of the 2ww. The doom and gloom come even when you're wrong (I had that feeling during the cycle that produced my twins!)

Here's hoping that your wait is almost over - and - that you're wrong!

 
At 08 September, 2010 21:52, Anonymous Nina said...

Always hope. Always a hug!

 
At 11 September, 2010 05:44, Blogger noela said...

Sorry I'm so out of the loop that I didn't know you were cycling.

I'm a bad, bad blogger!!

Of course I send you all sorts of good wishes for a good outcome!

When is your beta?

xx
N

 

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