Wednesday, September 29, 2010

One blob accounted for

Bigger clinic did have other instructions. So, this morning's U/S
showed a tidy little blob, right were it is supposed to be. Too bad it
isn't doing what it's supposed to. Still, a relief under the
circumstances. Most likely, the other embryo skipped town ages ago.
To make sure, I'll need more follow-up.

Bloodwork showed my hcg level has risen very slightly over the past
few days. The floodgates aren't set to open yet.
Possibly, I'll be offered medication next week, to evict the blob.
Pills of some sort.

Meanwhile, I've come to the the conclusion that a day in the office is
not compatible with PG failure. It doesn't matter how early the stage.
Really, I should have known better. But no, I went to work, cracked
before I even got there, and was practically packed home by lunch (by
a sympathetic co-worker).
I did manage to snatch some files with me to work on from home.
Somehow, the mere thought of facing people with a brave face is just
the thing to get the tears to well up. And then all is lost.

19 Comments:

At 29 September, 2010 15:13, Blogger Heather said...

I'm glad it isn't ectopic.

I'm sorry that this is still dragging on and that it will for some time. Not fair.

My heart is aching for you guys. How is DH handling things?

 
At 29 September, 2010 15:52, Blogger Sara said...

I'm so sorry, Lut. This really sucks.

 
At 29 September, 2010 16:24, Blogger Lollipop Goldstein said...

I am so sorry, Lut.

 
At 29 September, 2010 17:00, Blogger serenity said...

I am also glad it's not an ectopic.

It's eclipsed by the heartbreak I feel on your behalf. I am so sorry.

Hugs, sweetie.

xxx

 
At 29 September, 2010 17:11, Blogger Roccie said...

I am glad you are home. Time is painfully slow.

I am sorry this has been so rough. Loss is enough, but complicating it and dragging it out is making it even harder.

 
At 29 September, 2010 21:35, Blogger Thalia said...

Well, at least it's not an ectopic.

Of course you are sad, sweetie, it's a very very sad place to be.

thinking of you.

 
At 29 September, 2010 21:43, Blogger Hopeful Mother said...

Take the time you need to get your heart healing. It's going to take time.

I'm so so sorry Lut. Truly.

 
At 29 September, 2010 21:47, Blogger Brandy said...

I'm so sorry. That ultrasound is a horrible one to deal with.

When I had my miscarriage I also tried to just go to work. About half way through, after a lot of tears, I left and headed to Kroger. I bought pads, chocolate, and a Cosmopolitan magazine. It actually made me laugh because I wondered what the people around me would be thinking seeing that.

Anyway, take care of yourself in whatever way you need to because really, that's all that matters.

 
At 29 September, 2010 22:38, Blogger Vita said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 29 September, 2010 22:39, Anonymous Vee said...

I am very sorry Lut.
Hugs to you.

 
At 30 September, 2010 00:50, Anonymous Mrs. Hope said...

Well, I *am* relieved it's not ectopic.

That doesn't for a second take away from the loss and grief. I'm so so sorry. Take really good care of yourself.

 
At 30 September, 2010 03:53, Blogger rebecca said...

So sorry, wish there was something brilliant and comforting I could offer, but sadly I'm sorry about sums it up.
~LFCA

 
At 30 September, 2010 04:54, Blogger justine said...

Oh, I'm so sorry. Here from LFCA ... I, too, went to work ... and wondered what the hell I was doing there. It was too much. I hope that you can be kind to yourself right now. Thinking of you ...

 
At 30 September, 2010 05:06, Blogger Melis.sa said...

I'm so sorry.

 
At 30 September, 2010 14:11, Blogger HopeBPatient said...

So sorry to hear about your loss. You're right. It doesn't matter at all how early it is, it still hurts. Take care of yourself. Hoping for a quick resolution for you. Sounds like if your hCG isn't rising quickly you'll soon see a downturn and things will move along.
~ LFCA

 
At 30 September, 2010 16:23, Blogger Alex said...

I'm so very sorry. I've been there - it sucks so bad. And no, office isn't good right now. Try to take some time.

 
At 30 September, 2010 19:08, OpenID cowgirltn said...

I am sending you a big hug.

 
At 30 September, 2010 21:52, Blogger luna said...

I'm so sorry to hear this.

 
At 01 October, 2010 07:52, Blogger Bea said...

Big sigh of relief about it being in the right place. But if only it was doing what it's supposed to do. Thank goodness for your coworker. Hope you're coping ok today.

Bea

 

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