Friday, June 03, 2011

9 bottles ...

... of beer on the wall, 9 bottles of BEER - take one down, pass it around ...
... 8 bottles of beer on the wall!

(I'm sure those of you living in North-America know this song).

9 eggs were retrieved today. It was painful, more so than I remember
last times being.
I felt woozy and nauseous afterwards, my blood pressure was clearly too low.

My roommate had double that number (I reckon she was about 7 years
younger than me). Hearing it made me feel vaguely wistful - what one
could do with 18 eggs!

But there's the catch - numbers don't guarantee much. Linnea was born
out of a batch of 6 eggs, that yielded only 2 embryos.

If the details have lost much of their meaning to me, I see that as a
sign of resignation.
Soon I will be ready to quit*. A little voice in my head says "give
up, time to give up". I'm trying to change it's tune to "you've done
your best, your very best". A positive spin on the same message.

* Quit and move on to DE or adoption, when I'm sure every detail will
interest me again.

There will be no news until transfer day, when they call me to either
come over or not.

About the previous post, it feels good to compare notes. It is indeed
a grieving process, that takes whatever time it takes. I do see a
spillover effect into work, at times I compensate, at times I'm too
blue to care. I will be reading that book on reducing stress in the
workplace, because that spills over into my personal life too - and
that I can try to get a handle on.

3 Comments:

At 03 June, 2011 22:25, Blogger Hopeful Mother said...

Thinking of you, Lut, and those 9 eggs... giving you extra strength and pain reliever for your wait over the next couple days.

 
At 04 June, 2011 10:37, Blogger Vee said...

9 is gorgeous number!

 
At 04 June, 2011 19:57, Blogger Roccie said...

Congratulations on 9 opportunities!

I hope for the best quality and fertilization reports. I so hope you do not have to move on to the next step. It would be so wonderful to wrap it up here.

 

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